Ever had the feeling you don’t belong?

I never was that comfortable wearing ‘the company tie’ and restrictive company car policies always made me feel small. Ironically, the moment I switched to being freelance I found myself become far more loyal to my clients than I ever was to my employers and my own company car policy didn’t seem to matter anymore.

Similarly, I find myself fascinated by countries or regions that feel they do not belong to their mother countries. Take for example the Scottish Nationalists’ constant desire for independence from the United Kingdom. They have their own parliament now, why isn’t that enough? Why don’t they feel happy belonging to an integrated England, Scotland, Ireland and Wales. The UK is, after all, only a very small island?  Surely they cannot still feel demoralized from their defeat by the English, nearly five hundred years ago, at the battle of Flodden? 

If you look at it logically, Scottish independence does not make sense from a financial position, though there are those that argue otherwise. But as one of my business partners pointed out to me, “It’s not about the money, it’s about freedom, the breaking of ties, it’s all about why we ourselves are independent directors and not employees”.  

Every year hundreds or people apply to The Bayard Partnership; hardly any of them are really doing it for the money. Most are simply wanting to break away from something they feel confines them. They are willing to trade certainty and a good pension in exchange for having their own business card and personal website. 

In relationships too, I have seen that many people enjoy a deeper relationship with their partner when they don’t feel trapped, when they both fully appreciate that every day they have a choice and make the decision to return home. 

In life we are constantly being bombarded with choices; choices for going to work, choices for a new career or choices to concentrate harder and to perform better, even choices to do little or nothing of any real added value. These choices reaffirm our sense of belonging or not belonging. The truth of the matter is that most of the time we do not consciously even recognize them. 

Have a good week,

Harley